I can't fight that feeling....

Home from the dance, Jasmine shares some precious Middle School insights with us.

Jasmine: "Samantha told me some personal stuff tonite. It was pretty gross."

Me: "Really? Like what?"

Jasmine: "Well, she wears a thong. And she puts it on backwards so she can get 'That Special Feeling'."

Me: "What?!"

Jasmine: "Yeah. She got In-School Suspension for showing someone the thong. Her mom wears one too, and they both have their own massagers."

Me: "Massagers. Do you mean vibrators?"

Jasmine: "Yeah, that. Kayla slept over there and saw her mother using the vibrator. She went to the bathroom in the night and the mother's bedroom door was open."

Me: "How, exactly, do you know what a vibrator is?"

Jasmine: "It was in a movie I saw. The girl turned it on and put it under the blanket so I pretty much figured it out."

Me: "Ok..."

Jasmine: "Samantha also says she's bi-sexual because she made out with a girl once. "

Me: "Did her mom buy her the vibrator or did she.."

Jasmine: "She probably bought it for her because they both like 'That Special Feeling'. Her mom has a ton of condoms in her room. Kayla saw them when she slept over."

Me: "Is Samantha still taking her meds?"

Jasmine: "Oh yeah."

Me: "Good."