Wednesday, May 14, 2008

When reality and the internet collide

I've been a little hesitant lately to post here. A few months back, Jazz mentioned to a kid at school that her mom had a blog, but she didn't know the name of it. Turns out, it wasn't too hard to find me. This kid just typed in my name and up popped my blog. Normally, I wouldn't care, but the friend read through my entries and found a story about Jazz that I found to be funny. Jazz thought otherwise when the kids at school were laughing at her.

My point of being here was to tell my version of events and admit how difficult this whole parenting thing can be. I've begun to realize that my stories are not just my own. I share them with my kids. For Lila and Violet, that's not such a big deal but the same cannot be said for Jasmine.

Another reason I like to do this is to vent. I'm finding that increasingly harder to do. I can't really talk about (ok, bitch about) the other parents in the playground because many of them are computer savvy enough for MySpace pages. My fear is that these people will enter the names of school parents into the computer and see where they pop up. I'd, of course, pop up here discussing this bratty kid or that skanky mom and end up the Playground Pariah. I've already had one mom innocently enough ask me where I lived, only to have her confront me the next week wondering if I knew just how many sex offenders lived on my street. For whatever reason, she felt the need to enter my address into the Family Watchdog site. Maybe she does this to every person she meets, I have no idea. But faced with that kind of scrutiny, it's not hard to imagine the reaction I'd get if she found my cute little blog with some post criticizing someone at school. And if I can't bitch about the Playground Moms, what good is a blog anyway?

So here I am, at a crossroads. It seems the only way to move forward is to go away to a new space. A new blog where I can be anonymous might do the trick. Although, I'm not sure how this blog linked me to my name to begin with, so this may take me some time. If anyone would like to follow me along, let me know and I'll be sure to get you the new address. Unless, of course, our kids go to school together. Then I'll give you a fake address to a site that is rosy and never complains (and consequently is never updated either).